Like every decent moral individual I co-habitat with several stuffed animals. In addition to the young ones pictured here, I have a cat, a stingray and a polar bear living in my rafters.
I hope that they enjoy my apartment as much as I do—it’s a fantastic apartment and it’s located in Germany’s greatest cultural city, Weimar, home to Goethe, Schiller, Goethe, Goethe, Goethe, Goethe, and Goethe.
It’s been awhile since any of them have been lucky enough to take a decent vacation: I believe it to be cruel to bring them with me unless I have adequate breathing room for each of them.
There is good news though: I can send them to Berlin for a vacation!
© Teddy Tour Berlin
Teddy Tour Berlin will take my (and your) favorite stuffed animal on a fantastic tour of Berlin, including stops at the Alexanderplatz TV Tower, Rotes Rathaus, Berliner Dom, Brandenburger Tor, and the Chancellor’s Palace. For a few Euros more, they can visit even more of Berlin—like Checkpoint Charlie and the East Side Gallery.
All tours include a group photo at Brandenburg Tor and a picnic in Tiergarten –an appropriately named park for such a group of individuals.
I think this is a fabulous idea and I’m seriously thinking about sending my oldest stuffed animal, my stingray, on a well deserved vacation to Berlin—the least expensive tour starts at 39€ (based on German residency), ranging up to 139€ for the most extensive tour (based on non-EU residency).
There are some add-on tours including a boat cruise, a trip through Madame Tussauds, and tour of the gay parts of Berlin.
One might suspect that a trip to the Tiergarten might nail some aspects of the queer tour, if your stuffed animal is into wild inhibited sex in public places.
And for those of you who are concerned about your animals drinking alcohol before they are of age, Teddy Tour Berlin specifically asks whether you are ok with your stuffed animal drinking Berliner Weiße, and, for the vegetarians, if meat is acceptable for the stuffed animal’s diet.
It looks like my sock monkey could have a wonderful adventure.
I can see bringing a stuffed animal along and taking pictures of it in various places while you are on vacation, but paying for it to take its own little vacation seems a bit crazy to me!
(Shaking head) Why didn’t I think of that lucrative business idea?!?!?!?! I will take your sting ray for free but the polar bear is going to cost you…