July 2018


Dear Apple,

By the time you read this, it will be too late: I’ve made the decision to shift my custom away from Apple environment.

My gateway drug, the Apple iPhone, is not for me. I still remember when it was for me: It was at the WEBMU in Bremen (I think) where PapaScott showed me his iPhone and I was like – I want that. Within a week, I had one. It was amazing – and, quite frankly, put Apple back on the map for me.

A little while later, I bought myself a laptop computer. A MacBook. The MacBook was perfect for me and it became my constant companion.

Eventually I replaced my first iPhone with another iPhone – eventually landing on the iPhone 5. I also replaced my first MacBook with a newer version (a MacBook Pro that is now, as I type on it, rapidly closing in on its 6th birthday).

However, things are not going so well –the newest iPhones, to be blunt, are crap and my MacBook has developed some odd quirks that ought to be looked at.

On the iPhone front: I am a thumb typist. When I hold my iPhone in my hand, I hold it with my right hand and type with my right thumb. My hand is big enough to do this on the iPhone 5. It is not big enough to do it on the iPhone 6, 7, 8, or X. Thus, when it came time to replace my iPhone 5, I went with an iPhone SE.

Am I happy with it? No – not really: I am content with it. The podcast app is a disaster (some podcasts are unsubscribed for no apparent reason) and most App developers seem to forget that the iPhone SE screen dimensions are still out there. The main benefit of having an iPhone SE is that it is not attractive to thieves – it’s too old fashioned and out of date to be worth anything to anyone but me.

With respect to the MacBook, I am frustrated. Last October I said to myself, I will need to buy a new MacBook. I even did some passive research, deciding that for what I use my laptop, I didn’t need a MacBook Pro, but rather a MacBook – but that I wanted to wait for the newest generation to come out. I’ve budgeted a decent amount of money for this.

In the meantime, I’ve been waiting.

Unfortunately, my MacBook Pro has developed some odd quirks and I would like to have it looked at. However, whenever I look at available appointments for the Apple Genius Bar at the Apple Store in Berlin, nothing is available. I’ve looked in the morning. I’ve looked at night. I’ve never seen an available appointment.

I decided to pop by the store last Friday.

Now I do not fault the greeter who attempted to help me, none of the facts that he informed me of are his fault, but it boiled down to this: (1) there were no more walk-ins available on Friday, as of 2:00; (2) my best bet was to show up at 10:00 Saturday morning and be prepared to wait; and (3) once accepted, it is 8 to 12 working days before computers are repaired and returned.

Excuse me?

Eight to Twelve Days to repair a computer?

The greeter explained that it was because the Apple Store was the only one in Berlin and that maybe I would have better luck at one of the other authorized servicing companies in Berlin: same quality of service, he assured me, but it might take longer.

After listening to him go through this, what I understood was, “if you buy a new computer from us, good luck ever getting it repaired.”

In an instant my mind was made up: I’ve been using an Apple MacBook since about 2010 and the iPhone since about 2008. It is time to return to Windows.

Sorry to go,


PS – A bit of casual research after writing the above indicates I actually had an iPod before the iPhone – but the iPod’s functions were subsumed into the iPhone, so I forgot that I’d ever had one. I haven’t touched an actual iPod in over two years at this point. I own two, but they are never used.

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