September 2020


Faggot Findr®

I have to admit it—I love my iPhone, even if I do not use it to its full capabilities.

Really, its one of the few things I’ve bought because I fell in love with it—certainly the calling plan I signed up for isn’t the greatest, but it fits my needs. Right after I picked up my iPhone I flew off to the UK, where I discovered that the British iPhone carrier had much better offers for its customers than the one in Germany—something about greater competition in the UK.

I have installed a couple of great Apps for my iPhone: a train planner that lets me determine train schedules from wherever I am standing to where I want to go (for Germany), a train notice board that lets me see the current arrivals/departures board for train stations in Germany, a Berlin trip planner, a Twitter interface, a Wikipedia assistant, some Google tools, and iSteam.

Plus the Faggot Findr.

Now before all of you go searching for the App, that’s not what it’s really called, it’s actually called Orgy Arrangr.

I downloaded the App after seeing it mentioned on Queerty (which is oddly blocked by Caribou Coffee’s free Wifi) and created a profile on it.

Much to my unsurprised eyes, the nearest person to me was over 100 miles away—and within the first sampling of men that the program downloaded, I got as far away as the UK and southern France. It does this by taking advantage of the iPhone’s location awareness features—it knows that I am standing in Weimar’s Goetheplatz, waiting for a bus, and that the nearest faggot to me is drinking a bier in Köln – or some nonsense like that.

As time’s gone by, the situation has improved somewhat—standing in Marktplatz, I’ve been thrilled to know that there are fags only 50 miles away from me—at least fags using Faggot Findr/Orgy Arrangr on the iPhone.

So it was with great excitement that I turned on the program whilst overnighting in Berlin—when I discovered that there were some people only 3 or 4 miles from me—and that they had used the program somewhere between 3 and 23 hours before I arrived in town.

Such luck!

Actually, apparently during the train ride from Weimar to Berlin, I came within range of a young man somewhere east of Berlin who eagerly wanted to chat with me. Considering that he was over 500 miles away, it was really only a Porn Findr –he offered to send me a cock shot.

Anyhow, now that I’m in Chicago, it really is an Orgy Findr—I finally turned on the program this afternoon to discover that there are 14 people who are “0 feet away”.

I don’t know what to say, but it seems my room at the inn is a lot more crowded than I realized.

It’s no wonder that when I took a nap, I felt a presence in my bed.

3 comments to Faggot Findr®